It really felt like the worst.
I’m sure I am being overly dramatic, but at 7 pm Tuesday I was around 17minutes into a long arse screaming crying session from Miles, and I could feel myself welling up.
you know that fucking shit feeling when you can feel the tears coming and you are praying no one tries to talk to you because you know stringing words together without falling completely apart is impossible.
That was how I felt.
Miles is 10 weeks old & so smiley and chatting *most* of the time. Problem is, he’s going through a bit of a moment when it comes to feeding.
Could be allergies, wind, or even a cold coming on… whatever it is it fucking sucks!!
He screams when I try to feed him with almost every feed. Worse when it’s my right tit. It is stressful, to say the least!
Anywho, Adrian came home, and I’m assuming what I thought was being hidden internally behind silence and a fake smile, was obvious AF to him as he immediately stole Miles from me for a cuddle and to allow me to go take some time for myself… I didn’t even make it up off the couch before crying.
It sucks.
I hate crying, I don’t care who it’s in front of, I just hate it.
I miss creating.
I miss DM convos.
I miss creating courses.
I miss “me” time.
I’m thankful I have given myself the gift of unintentional blogging in this season of my life. In the past, I’d have dug deep to find a message, a meaning, a lesson… heck something inspirational to tie to this story, but not today.
Today I just needed to be real and present and show up for myself.
I decided a few days ago I would make space in my day to blog… everyday.
For me.
Not for any other purpose.
When a message comes through I’ll share it.
When I’m inspired to go deep on a valuable share, I will… and when I just need to write because it feels good… I’ll do that too
Most experts will tell you to always lead with value or end with a CTA (call to action)
Not today.
Today I awaken my Rebel Soul and blog because I want to. Not because it’s required to make a sale.
Time to tune out and tune in.